REFLECTIONS : 3 DAYS 2 NIGHTS AT KTM RESORT (BATAM)

It’s weird, or maybe it isn’t but, most of the three days and 2 nights that I have stayed here, I keep thinking of my previous travels – though not much – have found a way to always stay within me. Like the time when I was a lot younger and my family and I travelled around the south of India and I saw a scene in my mind that I will never ever forget. A line of beggars just waiting for the tourist to give them money. What made me think of this scene is seeing the slums, that we passed by to get to a stop on our city tour. It is not as obvious as the slums in India, but that doesn’t mean that it isn’t there. I saw children flying kites in front of their homes. Homes that is so unlike the homes I know back home. Makes me wonder how I would be if I were one of them instead of me. Would I be able to be as happy as them, trying to find joy in whatever form possible? The world is an evil place, yes  -  of betrayal, rape, injustice, poverty, abandonment, corruption, adultery, gluttony, materialism and so on. But if children who live in slums can have a smile on their face as they fly their kites, why can’t we try to be happy? The world is evil, yes, but it is up to us, each individual to make our lives as beautiful and fruitful as possible.

If we have no love, go out there and give love. NOTHING IN THIS WORLD GIVES ME MORE JOY THAN GIVING LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY. People love romantically and expect to be loved back thus the sadness comes, thus the disappointment comes, thus making you think you can always do better. But if you love someone UNCONDITIONALLY, even if he/she doesn’t love you back, you feel pain yes, but there is strength in that pain, like you know that loving is the best part of it all.

But then there is the other kind of joy where everyone hopes, prays to get. The joy of having someone you love, love you back.

Loving makes the bad things in the world disappear for a moment when you make someone else laugh or smile. Or even the kind of laughter and smile you give to yourself where no one understands, but you. People might think you are crazy, but you know within you that you are honest and true to yourself – and so even if the world has ten million bad, horrible things, you don’t turn bitter. You just keep your head high and smile.

That’s what I try to do time and time again. Smile, laugh, try not to take myself too seriously. I have to do this, or I will break, crack and slip into a vicious cycle that would be hard to get off. I know that the world is cruel, and horrible and evil, but how can I, a nobody be bitter when the children who live in slums and have every right to be bitter are not?

I will constantly live life trying to find beauty, peacefulness and love. I will try to have strength and be positive at all times. I will try to have strength and be positive at all times. People can throw anything at me, cruelty, abuse, pain, loss and all those horrible emotions at me, but I will stand here like a rock, always strong, always true, never standing down, never backing down in my own pursuit of happiness.

How can I be bitter when the moon is always there? How can I be bitter when nature always amazes me? How can I be bitter when I can love another? How can I be bitter when I have found the kind of understanding I have always wanted from another person? How can I be bitter when the boys in the slums are not? I just can’t.

Life is beautiful, no matter how much evil there is, Life is beautiful and I hope, pray, with everything in me that I will never forget this as I grow older. LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL.